Lame Ass White Chicks

Work Sista gots huself a shiny new kitchen table.

We skipped outta work early...which translates into a 9 hour day...  I hadn't yet been to Work Sista's new pad yet, and she needed more space than her car alone allowed to pick up the new table and chairs she had just bought...so I followed her in my car to the furniture store. 

The salesman was a tall handsome Caribbean beauty with a big smile and cheerful demeanor.  He took the legs off the table and stretch wrapped it so that we could fit it into the back of Work Sista's car along with 2 of the 4 stools.  The balance of the set fit into my car.

We stood in the rain outside her car, just fitting the stools into the front seat when Buddy came out carrying the table for us.  I held the back door open to the disaster inside ma sista's back seat and grimaced.  Buddy suggested we clean out the back seat..and we zipped around the opposite side of the car as he stood there holding the table. 

The light drizzle turned into sleet.  It was frickin cold.

I opened the trunk and made a face that elicited a laugh from Buddy who shook his head.  My gurl has a lot of stuff dudes...  She crawled into her back seat scooping armfuls of clothes and gawd knows what else in the mystery mix that decorated the seat.  She dumped said treasure into the trunk and I slammed it shut.  Twice.

:)

She giggled.

We went back around to help Buddy maneuver the table into the back of her car...but there was about a half inch of window frame blocking the way.  Work Sista leaned in to help Buddy push that bad boy in..

"Dayam this is heavy!!! And you stood there holding this?  Holy crap!!!"

I held the door open like the lame ass white chick I am.  I'm like, not the right kid for this kind of work.  I push with all my weight and generally just fall down.

A passerby kindly offered extra hands, and the three of them pushed and pulled and twisted the table, trying to slide it across the seats.

Another passerby stopped on his bicycle to watched the show.  And laugh his ass off.

I continued to hold the door open and get wet.

She had to leave the windows rolled down, but they managed to get that bad boy in.

All I have to say, is don't mess with ma Work Sista dudes.

I followed her to her house and we parked across the street. 

She opened the back seat and gave that sucker a shove and it popped across the window frame...so the door wouldn't close and we had to get it out.  She pulled and I pushed..and we pulled and pushed with all our weight until finally, the table was sitting on the sidewalk.

Summavabitch we bad!

She hoisted the table in her arms with a whine-groan and I stepped up behind her to help (finally).  I was exactly one inch behind her, both of us carrying the table top with one hand, holding it at about waist level down one side of us...all the way  across the street in the pouring sleet with this funky little shuffle walk.  I think I about died laughing at this point...I have no doubt we looked ridiculously hilarious!  Two soggy chicks shuffling across the street in the rain behind table top, their butts wedged in between the frame that houses the table legs....  it reminded me of Romper Room when they used to make cars and trucks out of cardboard boxes they'd step inside and shuffle around the room tooting and vrooming.  We must have looked just like that to anyone looking our way from down the street.  We are just way too cool!

And yeah...that frickin table was one heavy motha!!!!  Holy beejaysus!!

But we did it :) 

And it roooooks mawvelous dawlinks!

My poor car

Sheeza notso pretty these days...

I drive this sweet little Dodge Avenger...a small version of the Charger...  Not quite an awesomemobile, but pretty, and quick...and it has all the bells and whistles.

I always laugh when at car lots and they talk about the basic package.  That's a matter of perspective isn't it?

To me, the basic package includes automatic, power windows, air conditioning, cruise control...

The bells and whistles are the heated seats, the dohickey thing between the seats that keeps your cold drinks cold and your hot drinks hot, the automatic defrost on the side view mirrors, the thingamabop on the dash to put your drinks in and keep them cold...kewl dude...

I was so excited when I found my baby, shiiiiny....

And the first time I drove her...she handles with speed and grace.  She's a gorgeous, classy grey...sleek curves and sexy lines... 

Don't know if you are picking this up, but I love that car...

But she doesn't wear the winter tires or salt baths very well.  What a sad sight to see, the morning after the drive home the night before.  Smeared windshield..streaks of white down the sides...sad old plain looking winter tires...

sniffle

This is not a great time of year to run out of windshield wiper fluid, speaking of streaks of salt.  It can be a harrowing drive when you are on the highway, windshield wipers smearing layers of the crap splashing up from the car in front of you..and no wiper fluid to clean the salty glaze... 

You pull the wiper fluid thingamajiggy handle on the steering column as hard as you can, desperately trying to squeeze out the last few drops, so that you can see...just a little corner will do...

It's just not a cool place to be...

Anyway....

I need to find a car wash on the way home...baby needs a bath....