Thursday, January 14, 2010

That Twilight series...

Oh am I ever getting sucked in to this book.... 

Teenagers and vampires.  Good gawd I've finally lost my mind.

But it's gooooood.... my guilty little pleasure.  A guilt derived from years of experience that tells me just how much bullshit lies between the pages...

So here's this clumsy 'Average Jane'...meets the ultimate Bad Boy, gorgeous, intelligent...perfect at everything he does.

Eye roll....

And of course..he falls head over heels in love with her...swears that he will protect her for as long as he lives (which is, like, forever dude, since he's immortal) and pledges his undying love...literally.

Like any chick wouldn't dig that.

HOWEVER...there's real life.

So let's do the Reader's Digest version of the 'happily ever after'.  You know...after the wedding...

So the handsome groom maybe doesn't require for you to cook for him....but I don't imagine the task of doing the laundry after one of his 'hunts' would be fun.  Do your own laundry Super Freak.

Do you think he pees on the toilet seat?  What kind of toothbrush does he need?

Oh gawd the babies...  NURSING!!!  Lawdy..imagine those sharp little baby fangs on the nipples...holy cripes...owe...owe...owe

And he's 17 forever....how much 'his flavour' are you gonna be when you are wrinkled and saggy everywhere.  I mean, honey...good for you...but eegads, I'm feelin for HIM!

Anyway...at the moment, I too find myself swooning everytime he wraps her up in his arms..his gentle touch, his adoring eyes...sigh....

We can pretend.