Thursday, February 4, 2010

I Have a Theory for That






It's 12:32 AM and I am awake.  Wide awake.  Fucking brilliant how you can wake up after 3 hours of sleep, alert and brimming with the solutions to all of the non consequential problems in your life.

It’s a gift.
I’ve figured out what I’ll wear to work tomorrow, and that I’d like to wear something else to go shopping with The Tall One after work.  I suspect he’ll be wearing track pants, and so I’ve decided that either before or after we pick up his new phone, he’ll be getting a new outfit that he must wear before going to dinner.  We’ll be going to McVeigh’s, so that I might have a covert final appraisal of Bartender Jimmy and report back to you all on whether or not Habibi continues to hold title of Best Bartender in Toronto.  I really should come up with criteria for said position. 
Later.

That there is some important stuff ya know.

Have a theory for hunger am currently fighting...forgot to have dinner.  Had coffee before salon visit and wine after.  Meh...
Yesterday Ehshay came into work three feet off the ground (as usual) with story about his drive in.

Yes, I just switched gears a little...need a minute?
Ready?
Ehshay came into work and started telling us about the rubberneckers that caused his frustration.  Young St. Louis gave him a WTF in reference to ‘rubbernecker’.

 Eyshay gave the WTF pose and looked at me.  I shrugged.
It’s a construction site...occasionally we grunt too.
“Do you know what a rubbernecker is?” he asks me...eyebrows raised, eyes bugged out...
“uh...yeah” I start...
and Young J and Work Sista both echo St. Louis’ WTF... laughing and add-libbing theoretical definitions for the term.
Trust me...Eyshay is not one to walk away.   He’s like a little bulldog now...he’s got em right where he wants em...
Seeing where this is headed I explain that a rubbernecker is someone that slows down or stops to look at an accident on the highway. 
Ehshay very clearly vocalizes his surprise and utter dismay that no one knew that.
Uh...hello...I knew that..dorkuss....
And I had a theory.
See now you had to know I’d eventually get back to my topic, right?
The theory was that it was a generational thing...under 30 didn’t use the term. St. Louis, Young J and Work Sista are all under 30, while Ehshay and I are both over 30.
By the look on the very animated Ehshay’s face, it was game on.
As a couple more people filed in, we asked them if they knew what a rubbernecker was.  Big J, over 30 knew the correct answer...as did the other 2 over 30’s on site. Under 30 year old Metroman did not.
I was wiiiiinning :)
Ehshay, determined not to go down without a fight decided that Mcmikey, extremely intelligent under 30 year old, Ehshay’s Golden Boy Himself....would know the answer, proving me wrong.
He wasn’t in yet. 
Late in the afternoon, I came close to losing this fierce battle when Bobbielove, under 30, calmly defined rubbernecker to us.   But he turns 30 in a couple of months...so I held on....
Finally, Mcmikey arrived. 

Surrounded by the entire team, all in on the quiet war raging between Ehshay and I, Ehshay asked the unsuspecting Golden Boy if he knew the answer to the question.
“Do you know what a rubbernecker is?”
“Of course I do” says Mcmikey.
Ehshay celebrates, doing his own little jig...
My lil bro, Young J, needs to make sure though...
“What do you think it is?” he asks the somewhat bewildered Mcmikey, who is clearly in a hurry to get some work done, or something as equally trivial.
“Well, it’s like making out or something..” he starts.
And as the entire trailer bursts out laughing it’s MY turn to raise my arms and shout “I WIN!” as the mighty Ehshay hangs his head in defeat.
And that, ladies and gentlemen, is how we roll...
Now go to sleep...some of us have to work in the morning.