The new guy started this week.
MUAHAHAHAHAAAA
I returned from the loo to find him sitting in my chair going through a file. He looked up with the most sheepish look on his face. I couldn't resist.
I gave him the "wtf" gesture, palms up, and told him to get his ass out of my chair.
He started to fumble his way through an explanation and I cut him off...
"It's not a fucking library man, what are you doing?"
Outright panic as he gathered papers.
I started laughing and told him I was giving him a hard time...
"Take your time brother I need a smoke anyway"
But I scared him a little.
heh heh heh
Earlier today he asked Work Sista and I where someone was.
Now, keep in mind, neither one of us are secretaries or whatever the politically correct title is anymore. So it's game on when a dude sees a bra and makes an assumption.
We both looked at him and told him the truth...we didn't know.
He stared at us with the "shouldn't you know" look...disapproving frown and all that.
"Yeah, we just work here buddy. We don't have the secret password to the Clubhouse. We think we figure it out and they just change it on us".
He kinda got that one ..
"They gave me 'Pink Petunias'...should I be concerned?"
"Maybe brother".
It's all good. He's learning.
The other new guy is a little slower...and I think he's afraid of me. I said as much one day and Six Foot Scary whispered that Skinny new guy is afraid of everyone.
That kind of takes the fun out of it.
Skinny stood in front of me and asked me to fetch him a file on his second day.
insert eyeroll
I pointed to the cabinets behind me and told him to have at at.
"Well (dramatic pause for effect) ...what do you do when (topdogs) ask you for something?" he says, insult laced with that not-so patient 'teach the dumb office beatch her place' tone of voice.
"They don't ask, they just help themselves."
I swallowed the "they know better" that almost came out. He doesn't know better after all. He, like the other new guys, assumes that if you have ovaries you must be there to serve those with balls. Some dudes don't think hard enough to imagine some of the ovary carriers have a few more credentials... But I cut them some slack. It takes a lot of concentration just walking upright.
:)
At least Sheepish has a sense of ha-ha.
And at lunch today, he earned Kudos.
We had pizza brought in for a going away party for Six Foot Scary and Eyeballs.
The usual banter and insults were flying - it was hilarious...often extremely inappropriate, but hilarious. At the butt of most jokes was the Italian Stallion who is the self appointed class clown.
The Italian Stallion was bragging about his ninja like qualities (he is a big dude and most definetly not ninja-like) when Sheepish pipes up and says "only an Italian ninja would wear a fluorescent orange vest".
Holy mother of mother's comin outta left field.
"When did you fuckin start?" says the Stallion
Lawdy we were dyin with the one liners...what a hoot.
That's the business...this is the atmosphere...and this is how we treat the fresh meat.
We break em quick.
:)
